Purity
“Everything is pure to those whose hearts are pure. But nothing is pure to those who are corrupt and unbelieving, because their minds and consciences are corrupted. Such people claim they know God, but they deny him by the way they live. They are detestable and disobedient, worthless for doing anything good.”
Geez.
There is a clear distinction between those who are pure and impure. The pure of heart have clarity in their minds. True mental health comes from a clean heart. I think a lot of people frown upon purity because with it comes accountability. It means we have to frequently check in with ourselves, and sometimes we don’t want to confront what we see.
Innocence is not embarrassing.
I find that the more often I spend time with God (reading my Bible, praying, praising, meditating, etc.), the cleaner my attitude gets—really, the cleaner my well-being gets, physically, mentally, emotionally, sexually. My mind won’t even gravitate toward anything perverse.
You get out what you put in.
With that said, I can’t escape the close ties between purity and sexuality. God created us to be sexual beings, but oftentimes it’s abused by either ourselves, or sadly, others. Something that brings about a contaminated heart is sexual immorality, perversion, and obsession.
The Bible does have a lot to say about sex, and I’m grateful that God is not silent on the subject. He highlights a clear guideline of healthy sexuality and points out what He considers to be unhealthy sexuality. He’s pretty firm in His position on the purpose of sex.
God draws a thick line between sexual impurity and sexual purity. Hebrews 4:4 (MSG) says that “God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.” Sexual immorality in the form of pre-marital sex, adultery, compulsive masturbation, homosexuality, rape, abuse, and disrespectful fantasies about other people are all forms of sin that God expects us to surrender when we pick up a pure lifestyle.
Now, I want to point out some of things:
Living a sexually pure lifestyle is not always easy. Society is sex-driven. You can barely blink twice without being hit with some form of sexuality, whether through marketing or otherwise. But purity is a condition of the heart. Choosing and remaining steadfast in a sexually pure lifestyle takes effort.
The greatest way to change your perspective on sex to match God’s perspective is to study and read all that the Bible has to say on sexuality (there’s a LOT that would surprise you, trust me). With this said, surround yourself with people that have the same values when it comes to sex. In realistic terms, don’t be best friends with people that are constantly making crude sex jokes, posting borderline porn pictures of themselves or others, living lackadaisical in their standard of sexuality, or motivating you to compromise your godly standards when it comes to sex, romance, and relationships.
I do want to make it clear that this doesn't mean you cannot be friends with anyone struggling to live a pure lifestyle or has different views from you. What I am saying is that there is accountability in godly relationships, and accountability provides healthy discomfort.
2 Timothy 2:22 (NLT) says, “Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.”
If you are struggling in this area of life, then be straightforward and bring up the tough conversations. This is something I’ve purposed to do this year. And you may discover quickly that you are not alone when it comes to this subject. There’s a lot of relief in honesty. Sexual purity and safety does not have to be a “hush, hush” topic …it shouldn’t be because God designed it to be important.
If it feels completely impossible to live a sexually pure life, then set aside extra time to spend with God. He is pure, and being around Him motives you to be pure. 1 John 3:3 (NLT) says that we are to be pure as God is pure. It’s extremely hard to be pure when you don’t have a clear idea of what it even means or looks like to be pure.
I once heard (from Moral Revolution, I believe) that all sexual sin stems from a lack of trust in God. I cannot tell you how hard I pondered that. The more I thought about it, the more it made sense. I’ll explain in different examples:
Sexual purity can seem hard because we don’t trust God to bring us a loving spouse.
Sexual purity can seem hard because we don’t trust God has made us pure from past mistakes.
Sexual purity can seem hard because we don’t trust God to give us the love and attention we crave.
Sexual purity can seem hard because we don’t trust God to give us a fulfilling, purposive future.
When we approach God with distrust, we’re more likely to gravitate toward something that is temporarily gratifying. But let me tell you, temporary gratification is in no way better than lasting satisfaction that stems from a foundation of genuine love and truth.
Our bodies are not our own. This seems like a controversial thing to say in a society that pumps nothing but self. It’s even more controversial because feminism preaches that women have full and complete ownership of their bodies. While that has slivers of truth in it, it’s still contrary to the Bible. As followers of Christ, our bodies become incense on the alter. Our bodies are the dwelling place, the temple, of God. The Bible is clear about the physical body belonging to God and His view of purity:
“Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”
more: Romans 12:1-2 NLT | 1 Corinthians 7:2-4 NLT | 2 Corinthians 7:1 NLT
I did not bring up any of this to condemn anyone or make anyone feel unworthy for certain sexual decisions. The beautiful thing about God is that He makes our wrongs right and redeems the time we wasted on sexual impurity.
1 Corinthians 1:30b (NLT) says that “Christ made us right with God; he made us pure and holy, and he freed us from sin.”
Choosing to follow Jesus means we’ve been purified from every form of sexual immorality. We’re clean now. Everything from the past is washed away. And from this moment on, we walk out a sexually pure lifestyle. There is no condemnation when we belong to Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1).
God is more than able to restore our sexual purity and make it as if there was never a trace of impurity to begin with.
He doesn’t blame us; He doesn’t reject us.
Out of love, He sacrificed His own body to make ours pure.
“Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault” (Colossians 1:22 NLT).
I’m by no means an expert, but God has dealt with my heart about all of these things. All I can offer is the truth of what God says about sexuality in His Word x
5 Verse Study
2 Corinthians 6:14-7:1
1 Corinthians 6:12-20
1 Corinthians 7 (yes, the whole chapter)
Proverbs chapters 5, 6, & 7 (bonus points if you read in TPT)
Psalm 91 (think of it in regards to relationships, love, sex, and marriage)